It was a sunny, yet somber day in September, and Squall was feeling at his lowest on this particular day. It was the very day that, while several years ago, Squall’s first and most beloved kitten, mittens, had perished in a mining accident. While Squall loved his current and also incarcerated cat, Purina, Squall always held his first kitten up to an impossibly high standard.

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. Squall turned over to face the door.

“Who could that be,” Squall muttered to himself, as he doesn’t have X-Ray vision, and was clearly oblivious who could be on the other side of that door.

“Squall, open up, it’s me,” yelled a female voice from the other end. Though, Squall wasn’t psychic and couldn’t figure out who “It’s me” could possibly be, he contemplated the fact that, perhaps he misheard the name and realized that it could be that fat chick from named Mei from school. However, unfortunately for Squall, the word “fat” echoed throughout his mind, triggering the all too present feeling of his own body images after suffering a catastrophic scar from the blade of Cipher.

“Be more specific,” Squall yelled at the door.

“It’s me, Rhinoa. Please open the door.”

Squall recognized that name, as they have had an on-and-off relationship for some time. Also they helped save the world and stuff from some crazy sorceress named “Ultimate-Encyclopedia” or something. Unfortunately, due to the events of his battle with the lady-wizard, his mind suffered from severe amnesia, leaving the only memories of the cold dark existence that he has come to know as life.

*************

            Opening the door, Squall could see the smiling face of Rhinoa staring back at her, obviously pleased with herself.

“Please stop smiling today. You know that happiness is a trigger for me today. Ever since I lost my three-day old kitten named Mittens in that awful accident.”

Rhinoa suddenly stopped, feeling abashedly ashamed that her absolute lack of sensitivity for Squall’s feelings weren’t at the forefront of her mind.

“I apologize,” she apologized.

“I accept your apology,” Squall said accepting her apology. “So what brings you to my house on this somber September day?”

“I wanted to surprise you, today,” Rhinoa said.

“You know I don’t like surprises. It’s a trigger, Rhinoa,” Squall said hanging his head low, feeling the blackness of his existence being pulled towards the ever-meaningless pits of despair. “Ever since I learned that Darth Vader was Luke Skywalkers father, I couldn’t handle the fact that Laguna could never come out and tell me I’m his son!”

“He also didn’t cut off your hand either,” Rhinoa said snidely.

“TRIGGER,” Squall said pointing to the giant gash across his face.

“Ok, I’m sorry, but I thought perhaps it would be a good idea if the two of us would get out of the house and do something. Help get your mind off of the day,” Rhinoa said holding up a pair of theatre tickets.

“Annie? You want me to go see the play Annie? You know that play is a trigger for me. I was an orphan Rhinoa,” Squall said lamenting the fact that he was a loveless orphan named Annie.

“Yeah, I know you were an orphan, but I always thought that both of you ended up happily ever after,” Rhinoa said losing her smile.

“I wouldn’t know. A rich white guy never adopted me and gave me love. Instead, I was destined to live my days out as some sort of military grunt,” Squall said raising his voice.

“Ok,” Rhinoa said relenting on the idea of a play. “I’m sorry, I should have realized that was going to be a trigger for you.”

 

Squall sat on the couch, his mind drifting while Rhinoa started to shift through her purse.

“Perhaps if we aren’t going to go out, maybe we could stay in?” Rhinoa pulled out the newest season of Doctor Who, her favorite show.

“And do what,” Squall asked without even bothering to look to see what Rhinoa was saying.

“Well, the new season of Doctor Who is out, a time-traveling doctor trying to save the world—“

“Time Travel, Rhinoa? You know Time travel is a huge trigger for me, after we fought the evil space lady wizard, Ultimate Encyclopedia. Of all people who I thought would understand that trigger, Rhinoa, it should have been you.” Squall whipped his long hair to the side in an act of defiance.

“Well, if you can overlook that aspect of the show, it’s got this really cool spacecraft shaped like a police call box named TARDIS,” Rhinoa said with an ounce of hope that Squall would reconsider.

“Wow,” Squall said sarcastically. “You just don’t know when to stop being so offensive, do you? You know I find that word and any other word relating to “Retarded” as a trigger. You know we have a retarded friend, Zell.”

“I don’t think Zell is retarded,” Rhinoa said.

“Again with that word, Rhinoa?” Squall was obviously displeased.

“But you just said…”

“It’s a trigger,” Squall said cutting her off.

“Ok,” Rhinoa said stuttering for a moment, trying to think of what else the two of them could do. “Maybe we could play some video games?”

“Video games,” Squall said perking up.

Breathing a sigh of relief, Rhinoa nodded in agreement.

“Yeah, I was thinking about Minecraft,” Rhinoa said hopeful that there would be nothing offensive about a child’s game.

“First off Rhinoa, that’s just the biggest middle finger you could give to me on this day. Not only is the term video game a trigger, as I am having an existential crisis knowing that my very own existence likely comprise of a series of binary codes in some sort of large matrix like computer program. But Minecraft? Minecraft? My cat died in a mine, Rhinoa, while crafting me a Valentine’s Day Card! That’s like two triggers in one,” Squall screamed at her.

“But it was September,” Rhinoa said while complexed.

“HE WAS PLANNING AHEAD!”

“I can’t see why Quintis ever chose to stay with you,” Rhinoa snapped.

“Are you trying to put me into a trigger overload, you know she left me. That was a low blow,” Squall said solemnly.

“I’m about two seconds away from killing you,” Rhiona said out of frustration.

“MY MOTHER DIED IN CHILDBIRTH! THAT’S A TRIGGER!”

*************

Rhinoa suddenly stormed off, leaving Squall to sit there and sulk, as she was so tired of having to try an appease every sort of trigger that anyone might have. All her goodwill had suddenly vanished, despite her efforts, the individual was clearly a narcissistic jerk who only cared about their own self-serving agenda without taking into account that, despite none of the fact that none of these words acted as triggers to her, she was expected to walk on eggshells and attempt to appease every single whim of any individual. She was done, and she stopped caring.

*************

Meanwhile, Purina the cat strolled in the room, smiling at the fact that his least favorite human was leaving the apartment, and doing so in a fashion where she was visibly upset. Purina hated her. She hoped that she would get hit by a bus on the way home, but Rhinoa could somehow feel the radiation of those vibes as she stopped and glared at the cat.

“Why do you hate me so,” Rhinoa demanded. “You know that wishing me death is a trigger. Every time you wish to cause harm to me, it is just another excuse to justify violence against women.” Rhinoa said what she has been wanting to say to that cat for a long time before storming off.

But Purina didn’t care, because he was a cat and didn’t understand. He was also having too good of a day. Purina finally posted bail and got out of jail until his pending court case was to be brought before a jury. Nothing could ruin this day…

“What are you doing here, Purina” Squall said as if he was about to spit venom. “You know your presence here is a trigger for me. MITTENS DIED ON THIS ANNIVERSARY.”

It was as that moment that Purina remembered why he wanted to enact vengeance on his human.

[To Be Continued]